Void Magazine Associate Art Director, Mallory Taylor Turner, came out of a brief semi-professional surfing career retirement to wax up her board and compete in the Sisters of the Sea Surf Classic that took place at the Jacksonville Beach Pier on Saturday, September 8. Turner has been out of the scene for a awhile because of a traumatic camping-related injury that occurred earlier this year. Additionally, a new breed of young female rippers have shown up eager to prove themselves. Turner, at the ripe old age of 23, is now considered a grandma in the surfing world. But would she let that stop her? Absolutely not. She ripped and teared her way to a second place finish in the event showing everyone that this kitty still has some purr.
We were lucky enough to sit down with Turner to get an in-depth interview.
Void: Mallory, what made you come out of retirement?
Mallory: Ya know, I just wasn’t getting as many likes on Facebook as I used to, people didn’t think I was cool anymore I guess. Plus, all six of my cats abandoned me. So I really had to step up my game and thought that surfing would win back their hearts.
V: What was your strategy for the contest?
M: Simple really. Rip it, hit it, stick it.
V: Please explain your pre-event warm up routine.
M: I like to sleep in a hyperbaric chamber the night before. Then pre-heat I do 17 jumping jacks, touch my toes for at least 20 seconds, chug two waters and a Coca Cola Classic, then listen to my Meow Mix cassette tape before I paddle out.
V: So you finished in a very respectable second place. Congrats. How does it feel?
M: You know, my father always told me, if you’re not first your last. But how I see it is, when your just one away from number one, it’s basically number one. Right?
V: Is there anything you would have done differently?
M: Sausage, egg, jalapeno, cheese, tater tot, and pinto bean burrito was a bad choice.
V: Do you think your injury played a part in your performance?
M: Besides the horrifying flashbacks of jumping over the camp fire everytime I hit the lip, I’d say it barely affected my performance.
V: In all seriousness, you did a heck of a job and we’re all very proud of you.
M: Thanks. Sisters of the Sea put on a great event. Everyone surfed really well. Congrats to all the girls who competed.
V: Thank you Mallory for your time. We hope you’ve won the the hearts of all your cats back. Now get back to work.